Chinese journalist Wang Jing in an October 2020 photo in Belgrade, Serbia, where she stopped on her way to the United States. She is seeking asylum after her imprisonment in China. (Wang Jing)Features & Analysis

（译文）中国公民记者王晶在2020年10月在塞尔维亚贝尔格莱德的照片中，在前往美国的途中停下了脚步。 她在中国入狱后正在寻求庇护。 （王晶）

‘I had escaped death’: 64 Tianwang journalist Wang Jing recounts her traumatic imprisonment in China

“我逃脱了死亡”：64天网新闻记者王晶讲述了她在中国的痛苦囚禁

By Iris Hsu/CPJ China Correspondent on Ma由徐若// CPJ中国通讯社撰写由徐若// CPJ中国通讯社撰写rch 29, 2021 8:30 AM EDT

2021年3月29日，美国东部时间上午Iris Hsu / CPJ中国通讯

Most journalists jailed in China are afraid to speak out after their release. In a rare interview, Wang Jing, who is now in the United States seeking asylum, has recounted her imprisonment and alleged torture in China.

大多数在中国被监禁的记者在获释后都害怕大声疾呼。 在一次难得的采访中，现正在美国寻求庇护的王晶，叙述了她在中国的监禁和酷刑。

Wang was arrested in 2014 when she was reporting on a protest for the now-defunct news outlet 64 Tianwang. In 2016, she was sentenced to four years and 10 months in prison for “picking quarrels and provoking trouble” in her writing on human rights, as CPJ documented at the time.

王女士于2014年被捕，当时她正在为现已倒闭的新闻媒体64 Tianwang进行有关抗议的报道。 正如CPJ当时所记录的那样，2016年，她因撰写人权报道而被以“寻衅滋事”罪判处有期徒刑四年零十个月。

Wang was released from Jilin Women’s Prison in Jilin province in 2019 after serving a full sentence. She found her world turned upside down. After losing direct contact with her family for nearly five years, she said her husband was unwilling to reunite and her daughter barely acknowledged her. The two live in Japan; CPJ called a number for Wang’s husband and someone picked up the phone but did not respond to questions.

服完满满的刑期后，王在2019年从吉林省吉林女子监狱获释。 她发现自己的世界颠倒了。 与家人失去近五年的直接联系后，她说丈夫不愿团聚，女儿几乎不承认她。 两人住在日本。 CPJ给王的丈夫打了一个电话，有人接了电话，但没有回答问题。

Thinking she could be rearrested, and that it would be nearly impossible to see her daughter again if she stayed in China, Wang fled the country, stopping in Switzerland, Serbia, and Turkey before landing in the United States.

鉴于她可能会再次被捕，如果她留在中国，几乎不可能再见到她的女儿，王逃离了中国，在瑞士转机登陆到塞尔维亚，在塞尔维亚停留后经土耳其，然后登陆美国。

Now in Seattle, she now aims to revive 64 Tianwang, a human rights news website founded by publisher Huang Qi, who has been imprisoned since 2016. According to CPJ’s review of the site’s archive, 64 Tianwang has not published new material since 2017.

她现在打算在西雅图重振64天网，这是一个由出版商黄琦创办的人权新闻网站，该网站自2016年以来就被监禁。根据CPJ对网站档案的审查，64天网自2017年以来就没有发布过新材料。

In a telephone interview, Wang told CPJ in unsparing and graphic detail about the mistreatment she experienced, and her advice for journalists who continue to work in China amid state repression. It is not possible for CPJ to independently verify Wang’s account, but it is in line with details of prison abuse in China documented by Human Rights Watch.

在接受电话采访时，王女士告诉CPJ她所遭受的虐待，以及为在国家镇压下继续在中国工作的记者提供的建议，都是毫不保留的图形细节。 CPJ不可能独立核实Wang的帐户，但这符合人权观察组织记录的中国监狱虐待事件的详细信息。

CPJ called the Jilin Prison Management Bureau and emailed the Chinese State Council for comment but did not receive replies. This interview has been edited for length and clarity.

CPJ致电吉林监狱管理局，并通过电子邮件向中国国务院征求意见，但未收到任何回复。 这次采访经过了长度和清晰度的编辑。

How did you begin reporting for 64 Tianwang?您是如何开始给64天网写报道的？

In 2013, I visited Huang Qi and the Tianwang Human Rights Center in Chengdu [Huang’s human rights organization, which also ran 64 Tianwang]. Previous to my visit, Huang Qi had posted an account of my family’s grievances on 64 Tianwang. My sister was murdered one day on her job at a national oil corporation in 1993. Law enforcement and prosecutors never took action and buried her case. She was only 18. I was grateful to him for paying attention to the disadvantaged and I admired his courage to speak up for them.

2013年，我访问了黄琦和成都的天网人权中心（黄的人权组织，也经营着64天网）。 在我访问之前，黄琦在64天网上发布了我家人的冤情。我姐姐于1993年在中石油的一家公司工作，刚参加工作不久，一天上夜班时被人谋杀。执法人员和检察官从未采取任何惩罚罪犯的行动并掩埋了她的案件。 她只有19岁。我感谢他关注弱势群体，并赞赏他勇于为他们说话的勇气。

I saw the hardship Huang Qi endured for speaking out for the disadvantaged in China and felt the desire to share some of the burden. I asked what I could do to help and Huang asked me to edit articles and interview people — protesters whose lands and houses were forcibly taken over by the state, people who faced local corruption or wrongful imprisonment, or people who dealt with other social issues. That’s how I started working for 64 Tianwang. As a citizen journalist, I photographed and reported news on the ground and sent [my material] back to Huang immediately.

我看到黄琦为在中国的弱势群体大声疾呼而忍受的艰辛，并感到有分担负担的愿望。 我问：“我能做些什么？”黄让我编辑文章并采访人们——抗议者的土地和房屋被国家强行接管，面临地方腐败或非法监禁的人，或处理其他社会问题的人。 这就是我开始为64天网工作的方式。 作为一名公民记者，我拍摄并报道了地面新闻，并立即将我的资料发送给黄先生。

When I began to protest against the injustice [my family experienced] I discovered a corrupt and dark side of the Chinese government extending across the public security and justice departments. I was searching for a way out of this unrelenting anger. Through being a citizen journalist and a “Tianwang volunteer,” I found emotional and spiritual comfort in speaking out for the disadvantaged. My life became busy and fulfilling, and my depression was gone.

当我开始抗议不公正[我的家人经历]时，我发现中国政府的腐败和阴暗面遍布整个公安和司法部门。 我一直在寻找摆脱这种屈辱愤怒的方法。 通过当一名公民记者和“天网志愿者”，我在为弱势群体大声疾呼时感到情感和精神上的安慰。 我的生活变得忙碌而充实，我的沮丧情绪消失了。

You were arrested the year after you began reporting for 64 Tianwang and you said you were tortured in custody. What are you able to share from that period? 在您开始为64天网报道的第二年，您就被捕，并说您被拘留时遭受酷刑。 在那段时期您可以分享什么？

I was tortured and mistreated at the police unit, the detention center, and the prison.

我在警察局，拘留所和监狱中受到酷刑和虐待。

When I was taken to the police unit, I pretended to be unconscious. The police put me on the concrete floor and then dragged me by my legs into a tiger stool [a device used for restraint and torture]. I felt my bones on the spine roll onto the tiger stool one by one. It was unbearably painful and my hip bones were damaged because of it. Then, the officers used shoe insoles to slam and gag me for an entire day and night. In the end, four male policemen grabbed the handcuffs on my hands and shackles on my feet to carry me into the detention center’s cell without checking my physical condition. My wrists and ankles were blue and swollen.

当我被带到警察局时，我装作昏迷不醒。 警察把我放在水泥地板上，然后拽住我的双腿将我拖到老虎凳里[用来约束和折磨的装置]。 我感到脊柱上的骨头一节一节地搁在老虎凳上。 它非常难以忍受，并且因此而使我的髋骨和脊柱受损。 然后，警察用鞋垫猛烈地敲打我一整夜。 最后，四名男警察抓住了我的手铐和脚铐，将我抬到看守所的牢房中，而没有检查我的身体状况。 我的手腕和脚踝发青肿胀。

That night, I got up and tried to commit suicide by slamming myself against the glass window [in the prison cell]. [Guards] put full-body handcuffs and shackles on me. When the morning came, the director of the correctional team came into the cell and slapped me in the face with flip flops. I was beaten, scolded, and slapped many times by the same director during my time at the detention center for resisting forced labor.

那天晚上，我起身并试图通过撞向[看守所牢房]的玻璃窗自杀。 狱警给我戴上联体手铐和脚镣。早晨到来时，管教队的负责人走进牢房，用拖鞋底打我的脸。 在看守所期间，我曾被同一个管教队长多次辱骂和殴打，因为我抵抗强迫劳动。

One time I was attacked by two female correctional directors. They took me into a room with no cameras and kicked me violently with their high-heeled shoes for fighting back. They took turns beating me and I tried to fight back. They didn’t care if it was my head or spine. My already-injured hip bones and spine were damaged further. Then they directed other prisoners to drag me on the floor. The bruises I got from this attack lasted two months. I couldn’t feel one of my legs or walk for a while. I still suffer from these injuries today.

有一次，我遭到两名女管教队长的毒打。他们把我带进没有监控的房间，用穿着高跟皮鞋的脚猛烈踢我，因为我反抗了其中一名队长对我的殴打。他们轮流殴打我，我试图反击。 他们不在乎是我的头还是脊椎。 我已经受伤的髋骨和脊椎进一步受损。 然后他们指示其他囚犯将我拖到水泥地面上。 我从这次袭击中得到的瘀伤持续了两个月。 我曾一度一只腿失去知觉而不能走路，直到今天那条腿依然没有彻底恢复。

For more than half a year in the detention center, I wore shackles and handcuffs that were connected by a steel wire. There was a mixture of excrement, urine, and rice on the handcuffs and shackles. I couldn’t stretch my arms and legs even while sleeping. This was the most torturous thing.

在看守所，开始的半年多的时间，我都戴着连体脚镣和手铐。手铐和脚镣上排泄物，尿液和米饭混合在一起。 即使睡觉，我也无法伸展胳膊和腿。 这是最痛苦的事情。

I went on a hunger strike for six months after the day I was arrested. My weight plummeted to 20 or 30 kilograms (44 or 66 pounds) from 64 kilograms (129 pounds). I was extremely skinny and had severe anemia. I lost most of my hair. I couldn’t do simple addition and subtraction using figures under one hundred. I would forget what I wanted to say in the middle of a sentence. Sometimes I couldn’t move while sleeping because my body and heart were in so much pain. It felt like I was dying when that happened. I had attempted suicide many times, but I never succeeded. So I tried to kill myself slowly through hunger strikes.

被捕那天后，我进行了六个月的绝食抗议。 我的体重从64公斤（129磅）下降到20或30公斤（44或66磅）。 我非常瘦，患上严重的贫血。 我掉了大部分头发。 我无法使用100以下的数字进行简单的加减运算。 我会忘记我想说的话。 有时候我睡不着觉，因为我的身体和心脏都非常痛苦。 那时，我感到自己快要死了。 我曾尝试过多次自杀，但从未成功。 因此，我试图通过绝食慢慢杀死自己。

You had a brain tumor before you were imprisoned. Did you try to seek treatment?在入狱之前，您患有脑瘤。 您是否尝试寻求治疗？

Since entering the detention center, I felt that my brain tumor was getting worse day by day. I always wanted to get it checked and receive surgery.

自从进入看守所以来，我感到我的脑瘤每天都在恶化。 我一直想检查一下并接受手术。

I knew I met the requirements for medical parole, so I applied with the prison guards’ guidance. When I checked into the hospital, the hospital added insulin to the nutrition bag which caused me to have allergic reactions such as breathing difficulties. Fortunately, I quickly turned off the drip. When I discovered that the hospital did not have a neurosurgery department at all and did not have the facilities to perform the operation on me, I promptly refused the operation arrangement and asked to go back to prison.

我知道我符合医疗假释的要求，因此我在狱警的指导下提出了申请。 当我到医院检查时，医院在营养袋中添加了胰岛素，这使我产生了呼吸困难等过敏反应。 幸运的是，我迅速关闭了滴水系统。 当我发现医院根本没有脑神经外科部门，也就是没有对我进行手术的资质时，我立即拒绝了手术安排，并要求回监狱。

At the hospital, I developed gallstones. The hospital told me if I didn’t remove the gallstones it would be life-threatening. They tried to force me to undergo surgery and would not let me return to prison. I cried and pleaded with the doctors to let me be discharged from the hospital. The prison guards came to pick me up.

在医院，我胆结石发作，医院告诉我，如果不清除胆结石，将会危及生命。 他们试图迫使我接受手术，不让我返回监狱。 我哭着恳求医生让我出院，监狱管教才来接我。

When I returned to prison, I heard from other prisoners that the hospital had many unprofessional medical accidents. It made me feel like I was wise to refuse the surgery. I felt like I had escaped death again.

当我回到监狱时，我从其他囚犯那里听说医院发生了许多非专业的医疗事故。 这让我感到拒绝手术是明智之举。 我觉得自己又逃脱了死亡。

When I returned to the prison after 21 days, my 50,000 yuan (US$7,673) deposit for medical treatment on parole was fully deducted. The prison did not give me any itemized details or medical records, nor did it grant me medical treatment on parole. I was scared and angry at the same time, and I began to refuse to show up for roll calls and write letters asking the prison to show me these records. After a period of protest, I finally saw my medical materials. I was shocked to find that there were many forgeries and irregularities in these medical materials. I did not expect the prison guards and doctors to be this bold. Through collective corruption, they were risking the lives of prisoners. I started writing reports to the prosecutors and the warden.

当我21天后返回监狱时，我用来办理保外就医的50,000元人民币（7,673美元）被全额扣除。 监狱没有给我任何细节或病历，也没有给我假释鉴定，我感到恐惧和愤怒，并且我开始拒绝报数，并写信要求监狱向我展示这些记录。 经过一段时间的抗议，我终于看到了我的医疗材料。 我震惊地发现这些医疗材料中存在许多伪造和违规行为。 我没想到监狱看守和医生这么大胆。 由于集体腐败，他们不顾服刑人员的生命与健康，我开始向检察官和监狱长写举报信。

You were also placed in solitary confinement. 您也被单独监禁。

Later, I was retaliated against by the prison director. The director beat and scolded me on the grounds of not responding to the roll calls and asked the inmates of the anti-riot team to carry me into solitary confinement for 38 days. The solitary confinement gave me another test of life and death. As soon as I went in, I refused to be tied to the “bed of the dead” [a bed in which a prisoner is chained down, in Wang’s description]. About five or six guards besieged me and attacked me. I was exhausted from resisting desperately. I cried loudly and asked them what I did wrong and why they would try to kill a good person. They still tied me up. The torture in solitary confinement seemed endless. I was not allowed to move. I would be beaten and scolded harshly by the guards if I did.

后来，监狱队长对我进行了报复。 队长殴打我，因为没有回应点名，并责骂我，并要求防暴队的犯人将我抬去单独监禁38天。 单独的监禁给了我另一个生死考验。 一进去，我就拒绝被绑在“死人床”上。 大约有五六名警卫围攻了我。 我反抗到精疲力竭时，我大声哭泣，问他们我做错了什么，为什么他们会试图杀死一个好人。 他们仍然把我绑起来。 单独监禁中的酷刑似乎无止境。 我被禁止动态一下，如果我这样做的话，我会遭到警卫的殴打和严厉责骂。

When I first entered solitary confinement, I went on a hunger strike for five days, banged my head on the wall to commit suicide, and swallowed a large plastic bag, but I couldn’t die. Later, after I met with my lawyer, he told me that there was a lot of pressure on Internet speech outside. Huang Qi was also detained in a detention center, facing imprisonment, which made me understand the reality and understand that China does not care about the rule of law at all.

当我刚进入单独监禁时，我进行了为期五天的绝食，撞头自杀，吞下了一个大塑料袋，但我死不了。 后来，在我与律师会面之后，他告诉我，外面的互联网言论受到很大打压，黄琦还被拘留在看守所中，面临着入狱的经历，这使我了解了现实，并了解到中国根本不在乎法治。

Even though it promises to govern the country in accordance with the constitution, the Chinese Communist Party’s arrest of us is political persecution. I began to think about getting out of prison alive, and that exposing the inside story of the CCP prisons to the world is what I should do.

即使承诺按照宪法执政，中国共产党对我们的逮捕也是政治上的迫害。 我开始考虑活着离开监狱，而我应该做的就是将中共监狱的内幕暴露给全世界。

I couldn’t shower and had to use my unwashed hands to eat every day. I would be given a few mouthfuls of corn batter in the morning, a moldy rice cake, and some smelly salted vegetables for lunch and dinner if I “behaved.” In prison, the prisoners were given 120 milliliters (a half cup) of tap water a day. This was far from enough and some prisoners would drink the water in the toilet.

我无法洗澡，每天不得不用没洗过的手抓饭吃，如果我“举止得体”，我会在早上吃到几口玉米糊，跟发糕和一些臭咸味的蔬菜作为午餐和晚餐。 在监狱中，每天给囚犯120毫升（半杯）自来水。 水远远不够喝，一些囚犯会喝厕所里的水。

During the day, if you didn’t want to be tied to the bed, you would have to sit in a small square on the ground without moving. This made my body numb and I couldn’t get up to use the bathroom. [At that time] I probably wouldn’t have felt anything if I get shot by a bullet.

白天，如果您不想被绑在床上，则必须坐在地面上的一个小方框儿上，不能动弹。 这使我的身体变得麻木，我无法起身去洗手间。 [当时]如果我被子弹击中，我可能不会有任何感觉。

As I sat in the little square all day, the speaker in the room would be playing a recording of Di Zi Gui [a Qing Dynasty text on proper behavior] non-stop. I’d get a headache from it.

当我整天坐在小方框儿上时，房间里的广播会不停地播放弟子规的录音。 我会为此感到头痛。

I was not allowed to sleep until 9 o’clock in the evening. The mattress and quilt were very dirty with footprints and bloodstains on them. But if I could lie down and straighten my waist, I was happy. When I slept, the guard would knock on the door every hour and asked me to sit up and report back. If I didn’t get up to report, they would snatch my bedding and leave me in the cold. In the winter, the solitary confinement cell was extremely dark and cold.

直到晚上9点才允许我睡觉。 床垫和被子很脏，上面有脚印和血迹。 但是，如果我可以躺下并拉直腰部，那我会很高兴。 当我睡觉时，警卫每小时都会敲门，要我坐起来报告。 如果我不报数，他们会抢走我的床上用品，让我受凉。 在冬天，孤立的牢房非常黑暗和寒冷。

The physical punishment in solitary confinement was a challenge and torment that tested the limits of the human body. It was especially devastating to a woman’s body and mind. It was an abusive practice at the Women’s Prison in Jilin province.

单独监禁中的身体惩罚是考验人体极限的挑战和折磨。 这对女人的身心尤其具有破坏性。 这是吉林省女子监狱的一种虐待行为。

Finally, when the distress and the punishment [of solitary confinement] was about to end, the guards forced me to confess my wrongs and repent. I said that I was not guilty of any crime, and I would not confess even if I died. They then backed down and asked me to apologize to the guards, saying that I shouldn’t have refused to respond to roll calls and talked back to them. I agreed to that and I wrote [a statement] saying whether I was wrong or not, whether I was to blame or not, [my behavior in the prison] was all my fault. In the end, I signed “Wang Jing, a victim of an unjust, wrongful conviction.”

最后，当（单独监禁）的苦难和惩罚即将结束时，警卫迫使我承认自己的过失并写认罪悔过书。我说我没有任何罪行，即使我死了也不会认罪。 然后，他们退缩，要求我向警卫们道歉，说我不应该拒绝报数并与管教顶嘴。我同意了这一点，并写了一份“声明”，说无论我是不是错了，是否应该受到指责，[我在监狱中的举止]都是我的错。 最后，我签署了“被不公正，错误定罪的受害者王晶”。

The 38-day torment of solitary confinement had caused more damage to my body and mind. When I came out of the cell, my neck was crooked, and I couldn’t turn my head. My lips were dry and peeling, and there were a few white spots on my throat. My stomach hurt, my back hurt, and my head hurt. In the prison hospital, I was diagnosed with severe hypertension, cervical spondylosis, lumbar protrusion, pelvic effusion, and pharyngitis.

38天的单独监禁折磨，对我的身心造成了更大的伤害。 当我走出牢房时，我的脖子歪了，我无法转过头。 我的嘴唇干燥，脱皮，并且喉咙上有一些白点。 我的肚子受伤，背部受伤，头部受伤。 在监狱医院，我被诊断出患有严重的高血压，颈椎病，腰椎突出，盆腔积液和咽炎。

What was the final part of your imprisonment like? 您入狱的最后部分是什么样的？

Two months before I was about to be released from prison, the guards and the inmates intended to frame me for assault, saying that I was anti-[Chinese Communist] Party and anti-social, and that I would be given more punishment. In the afternoon before the guards framed me for attacking the officers, I started to lose control of my nerves. I asked the doctor for the sleeping medicine. She refused. I stayed up all night and kept talking. I had to say whatever I was thinking. I tried my best to control myself and stay calm. I now suspect that they drugged me, intended to make me hallucinate, and then use it as an excuse to frame me. The next morning the prison guards verbally and physically insulted and intimidated me, trying to force me to react and fight back. I pressed the emergency alarm, but it didn’t go off. Later the guards handcuffed me to the bed for half a month until the scars on my body faded. During this period, my blood pressure was high, and I was not given treatment for it. [I suspected] they wanted me to die of a brain hemorrhage.

在我将要出狱前两个月，警卫和犯人打算陷害我袭警，说我是反中国共产党和反社会的人，要给我加刑。在警卫陷害我袭警之前的下午，我开始失去控制自己的神经的能力。 我问医生要睡觉药，她拒绝了。 我一整夜不停地说话，心理想什么就必需说出来，我尽力控制自己并保持镇定。 我现在怀疑他们给我下了毒，意在使我产生幻觉，然后以此为借口陷害我。 第二天早上，监狱看守对我进行了言语和身体上的侮辱和恐吓，试图迫使我作出反应并进行反击。 我按下了紧急警报，但警报没有响起。 后来卫兵把我铐在床上半个月，直到我身上的疤痕消失。 在此期间，我的血压很高，但没有给我降压治疗。 [我怀疑]他们要我死于脑出血。

The prison wouldn’t allow friends to visit me. I felt that my life was threatened. I desperately drank water every day to try to reduce blood pressure and detoxify myself. After I was uncuffed, the guards were afraid that I would expose their inside corruption and began to harass me every day. They took away the evidence of medical expense fraud I had on them, threatened to put me into solitary confinement again, and asked other prisoners to intimidate me. The prison guards also deliberately confiscated my letters and the pictures of my husband and daughter and tried to shut me up by threatening the lives of my family.

监狱不允许朋友拜访我。 我感到自己的生命受到威胁。 我每天拼命喝水以降低血压和排毒。 解除我的戒具后，警卫们担心我会暴露他们的内部腐败，并开始每天骚扰我。 他们拿走了我举报他们欺诈医药费的证据，扬言要再次将我单独监禁，并请其他囚犯恐吓我。 监狱管教还故意没收了我的信件和我丈夫和女儿的照片，并试图通过威胁我家人的生命来使我闭嘴。

After you were released, what changed in your life and mindset? 获释后，您的生活和思维方式发生了什么变化？

After the release, I returned home. It looked like it hadn’t been cleaned for years. My mother laid on her bed all day with an oxygen tank, my husband changed, and my child didn’t acknowledge me as her mother. Everything was different and I was the only person whose memory was stuck [on the previous life of] five years ago. It felt like I was abandoned by the entire world, like I was from another planet, like nobody expected me to come back alive, and like they all thought I should die in prison. The distance between me and my family was hard to adjust to. I had to catch up with societal developments and keep learning. On the other hand, I also had to beware of surveillance, intimidation, and harassment from police and national security officials. But the most difficult of all was my husband’s coldness and losing contact with my daughter. It was beyond my capability to handle. At one point I even felt like it was easier in the prison. I became suicidal again and often cried in the middle of the night. I went to the hospital and was diagnosed with severe anxious and depression.

获释后，我回到了家。 家里看起来好多年没有彻底清洗了。 母亲全天躺在床上吸氧气，丈夫变了心，孩子不承认我是她的母亲。 一切都不尽相同，我是唯一一个记忆还停留在五年前的人。 感觉就像我被全世界抛弃一样，就像我是从另一个星球上来的一样，就像没有人期望我复活一样，就像他们都认为我应该在监狱中死去一样。 我和家人之间的距离很难适应。 我必须赶上社会发展并继续学习。 另一方面，我还必须提防警察和国保的监视、恐吓和骚扰。 但最困难的是我丈夫的冷暴力和与女儿失去联系，这超出了我的能力。 有一次，我甚至觉得在监狱里更容易，我再次想到自杀，经常在深夜哭泣。 我去了医院，被诊断出患有严重的焦虑症和抑郁症。

Given all that you endured, what advice would you give to journalists and journalism students reporting in China?鉴于您所忍受的一切，您将为在中国进行报道的新闻工作者和新闻专业学生提供什么建议？

I admire the bravery and passion of Chinese journalists and journalism students who try to report news truthfully and hope that they can persevere. The social responsibility of journalists cannot be ignored. It may not be easy to bravely face and expose the dark side of society and sometimes it may cost lives. But the responsibility of journalists is to let people understand the real world. People can only make correct judgments and choices when the information [they receive] is real. And the world will not be obscured by darkness.

我钦佩中国新闻工作者和新闻专业学生的英勇和热情，他们试图如实报道新闻，并希望他们能坚持不懈。 记者的社会责任不容忽视。 勇敢面对和暴露社会的阴暗面可能并不容易，有时可能会丧命。 但是记者的责任是让人们了解现实世界。 当[他们收到的]信息是真实的时，人们才能做出正确的判断和选择。 世界才不会被黑暗所笼罩。

Iris Hsu is CPJ’s China correspondent. Prior to joining CPJ, Hsu interned at Human Rights Watch, Center for Arms Control and Nonproliferation, and the Atlantic Council. Hsu obtained her master’s degree in international affairs from American University. She speaks Mandarin and French and lives in Taipei.

徐若is（Iris Hsu）是CPJ在中国的记者。 在加入CPJ之前，许女士曾在人权观察，军备控制和不扩散中心以及大西洋理事会任职。 Hsu从美国大学获得国际事务硕士学位。 她说普通话和法语，居住在台北。